To have a Dream...

Is it important to have a Dream? What if you don’t have a Dream at all, or maybe don’t have it any more?

I will be blunt: if there is no Dream, there is no particular interest or purpose in life. This could be very, very painful, mentally and physically.

Having a mere ‘purpose’ at home/family is one thing; having a Dream, something you are going for with all your might, is dramatically different.

I know one person who has a definite purpose in life – serving her family: she is a stay at home wife, she cleans, cooks, looks after her grown up son and her husband. By the way, the son and the husband have their lives and Dreams. They work and they study, and they know where they’re going. They come home to eat and sleep. 

She does not have any dreams, at all. Her life is empty and painful. Don’t get me wrong: she does enjoy serving her family. The problem is in a different area: no future, nothing to long for, beside the non-stop house duties. She does not have a job and she never will because out of her 40 years of life she worked only for 2 years. So the experience is simply not there. 

She has always been waiting for the right moment to start studying, to go back to work: but first she had to raise her child, then she had to look after her disabled mother, then she was too sad because her mother had passed away, and then it was too late because she turned 40 (!!!! Really? Is 40 too late?)  I will call this person Elaine.

There is another person whom I see at kids’ school every week. She is a young lady of approximately 30 years old. A few years ago, through a horrific car accident, she had lost the ability to talk, walk or look after herself. She was physically in pieces. Doctors have put her back together. For some period of time she didn’t have a luxury of expressing herself anymore, or walking around freely, or doing anything a typical 30-year-old would do. However, there was something extremely important that she managed to keep: belief in herself, desire for life, necessity to Dream. I would call this person Hannah.

Now, Elaine does not have any physical disabilities. She blames her upbringing for not being able to work, for not earning, for being bored and depressed, for not wanting anything in life. She explains that she is emotionally crippled by her mother who always would do things better, quicker. No matter how many times we talked about leaving the past behind, about becoming stronger and taking little steps towards richer (emotionally) life – the answer is always the same: ‘There is no way out’. She’s got no dream to go for, no desire to change.

Hannah has started slowly after her accident: she first realised what is important for her in life and why. It was extremely painful. In her wheelchair she would get into a junior school every week. Few months later - on crutches. Then walking by herself, with some help of her mother at times.

She trained her tongue again and again to speak, to roll again. She trained her brain by taking an initiative and helping the little kids to do their Maths and English. She would get very tired, it was not easy, let’s face it. But she always knew where she is heading to, and why. That is exactly what helped her to overcome lots of her pain and doubt. She had a dream of gaining her normal life back. She had the Dream. She still has it. She’s still going for it, strong.

The change – whatever you might desire in life – comes from within. It starts from realization: what do you want to achieve and why. You need to be able to look at yourself and your actions from a different perspective. Who are you? What are you capable of? Where are you today and why? What could be done today to start your change?

Design a plan for yourself: without a plan you simply won’t know where you are heading to. Then take small steps, which probably won’t be easy at first. But you will, surely, get through those little ‘obstacles’! You need to believe in yourself, and not to resort to typical and prosaic beating yourself up with something like “I’m useless, I won’t succeed, there is no point in trying.”

I have created an excellent plan how to make your Dream happen (if you have one, of course!). I will talk about it next week in my post.

How to minimise worries and maximise life’s enjoyment?

7 ways to eliminate worries and start living

“Worrying doesn’t empty tomorrow of its troubles… it empties today of its strength.” Corrie ten Boom (a Dutch Christian who, along with her father and other family members, helped many Jews escape the Nazi Holocaust)

  

How to minimise worries and maximise life’s enjoyment? Are these two questions even supposed to be together in one article? We usually concentrate either one or another. We either try to solve our problems or seek pleasurable things. Here I suggest the ways you can combine the two.

Part of the nature of humans is to be constantly developing, growing and moving towards a balanced and mature way of being. Your present personality is determined by both, what you really think of yourself now and by what you strive to become in the future. Mature individuals always work on their personal development. And by the word ‘mature’ I don’t mean just those close to 40 and over.

Personal development means to learn and apply special principles in life that will help you to attain emotional wellbeing, understanding and effectiveness in your everyday life. Simply said: to find and create that special balance that will allow you to be happy more often.

Look at some of the most inspiring individuals: Leo Tolstoy, Helen Keller, Albert Einstein, Barbi Thomas… What is the common trait amongst them? They never stopped learning, never gave up the search for the perfect balance. And they succeeded.

Here is 7 fundamentals, created by Katya French, for you to consider when you are in the need of change or simply a solution.

        1. Drop the Perfectionist

It is one thing to try to do something well; it is another to have the ability to stop perfecting it…

Problem: The need for perfection and the desire for inner peace and tranquility will always conflict with each other. There is always room for making something better, making it a different way. There is always an unconscious need to continue fixing or to know something better before doing it.

This is what is called Perfectionist Procrastination Paralysis.

Diagnosis: This is the inability to start a task or project, or the consistent delay of starting that task/project because of the need to be fully knowledgeable and for the outcome to be perfect. (Don't ask me how long it took me to write that. I am still panicking because I know it could be better.)

Thoughts of destruction could be: “Why am I so stupid?”, “Others are so much better at it than me”, “I am the type of person who takes a huge amount of time to master something.” “Others are more talented”. All these phrases are inevitably negative in their nature and are ‘perfect’ for developing a sense of non-accomplishment, low self-esteem and, as a result, poor productivity.

Cure: Drop your harsh self-judgement. They are not better than you. If you don’t start now, you will never get to the next level of it. Don’t overanalyse, jump into action, and you will begin to discover the perfection and tranquility of life itself.

         2.   Life is about to begin

Time illusions strongly rule our lives, often taking away the ability to enjoy what we have now, in this present moment. As we become adults, many of us learn the art of thinking and worrying about several things at once. Misfortunes of the Past haunt us, and they get topped up with concerns or hopes for the future.

Problem: Are you waiting for your life – real life – to begin, soon, in the future? Next week, when you finish your study, when your finish your project, when you get your dream house, when the debts are paid off, when kids become a little bit older, when you become healthy and good looking…. Then you will be able to enjoy it. Not yet.

Diagnosis: This is partial or complete inability to enjoy the present moment. The days and months go by, and then the years. And there is always yet something else to achieve, yet another obstacle/problem in the way that needs to be resolved. You keep promising to yourself: “A little bit more of my hard work, I’ll get there and then I will truly start enjoying my life!”

Has it ever occurred to you: these obstacles that you are constantly overcoming are YOUR LIFE? Life is a constant development, a challenge. That’s why you are alive, because you still have tasks to do and obstacles to overcome. Because you still have interest and the desire to strive. These obstacles are not your enemies, they are your good friends that help you to evolve, become a more educated/experienced person and achieve better results next time around.

Cure: Teach yourself to enjoy the process rather than the finishing product only. Start finding enjoyment in what you do: did you learn something new today while creating your perfect project? Well done! Did you have a nice cup of coffee and a good chat with your friend? Do consider it as a blessing. Did your kids tell you a story that is important to them? Consider yourself lucky that they want to share with you, that they want you to be part of their life.

Life doesn’t begin tomorrow or in a year’s time. Life is what you are experiencing now.

           

       3.  Be super wise about Selective Vision

Selective Vision is an enormously powerful tool if you use it wisely. You choose what you notice in life and you choose what you will or will not talk about.

Problem: Let me ask you a question: How often do you list your problems to yourself or when you’re talking to your friends?

You think about the bad sides of your life, while your mind gets populated with one great thought: “Things are bad!” You talk about your problems, your listener shows compassion, offers suggestions while you subconsciously stipulate in your mind: “Poor me, help!”

Diagnosis: It’s natural to ‘unload’ sometimes, that’s true. But the trick is to consciously weigh how much of ‘unloading’ you practice every time you speak. Don’t become a compulsive ‘unloader’. Watch how many negative thoughts you allow to enter your mind in the conversation with other and your self-talk.

Cure: Like anything else in this life: the more you do it, the more it becomes a prevailing part in your life. Just imagine, what if you were purposely looking for the good stuff in every day you live? The bad stuff is easy enough to find. So take a challenge: Today I will concentrate on the good sides. I will concentrate on how lucky I am, and the problems I’m currently experiencing, are only there to make me stronger and more prepared for bigger and wonderful things in life!

       4.  50% of your worries eliminated instantly

A lot of the time we get into pointless discussions with somebody else or ourselves: “This problem... It’s so terrible. I hate it. I wish there was a way out. I don’t know what to do!”

Problem: No matter if we are talking about personal financial problems or business not going in the right direction, what we do is we verbalise one way or another what you’ve just read above. You talk it over with your spouse or at your team meetings at work. Excuse my language, it is called ‘bitching about’ it is destructive and doesn’t lead to any solution for the better. It’s a maddening circle with no way out.

Diagnosis: The diagnosis here would be a simple socially acceptable way of ‘bitching about’, complaining without the search for solution. A mere statement of your problem embeds that problem further into your mind. Day after day in private life, or week after week in business life, you repeat your dissatisfaction or worry. Your correspondent usually agrees and adds oil into a flame by reiterating the same statements or simply nodding his/her head and saying “Yep, ok, I understand” or even worse: “I see”.

This is a perfect example of the unproductive cycle that will leave you sad, angry, needy and unsatisfied.

Cure: Ask yourself 4 questions and record your answers.

Something simple that we fail to do on a lot of occasions, is a down to earth approach. It’s powerful and it works without a hitch, every time!

Only 4 questions that will clarify your approach and solution to all your worries:

-               - What is the problem?

-               - What is the cause of the problem?

-                - What can I do right now in order to solve this problem?

-                -  How am going to do that?

Use the amazing A3 sheet of paper, a solution to any problem. I love it! It gives you a possibility to splash out and space to put lots of your thoughts and ideas. The questions will prompt you to answers. And once you’ve got your answers down, solutions will arrive instantly into your mind.

       5.  Put your mess onto paper

When the amount of things to do is overwhelming, it is so easy to start procrastinating, simply not knowing where to start.

Problem: It is truly amazing how creative you get when looking for excuses for not starting this or that project or a simple task. And then “Bingo! That’s it! I can’t do it now because …. [Insert perfectly found excuse]. What you experience after, is momentary relief and then pain of guilt because that task is still hanging above you, amongst so many others which just makes you sick.

Diagnosis: There are two things stopping you from taking action: 1) You don’t want to go through pain when you leave your comfort zone and 2) lack of clear vision – where to start. Unfortunately, the phrase ‘Start with something’ often doesn’t seem serious enough, and so you end up doing nothing. Apart from continuing to experience that guilt for not proceeding.

Cure: Get up, put yourself into a car or public transport, get to a stationary store, buy a few of the magic A3 sized sheets of paper, bright markers and then quickly return to your home/office, before you find other ways to procrastinate.

What you are going to put on your A3 paper is a mind map. A mind map is a great way to brainstorm, get a full picture of projects to do, put tasks and ideas into steps, and most importantly to clarify your vision. Without a clear vision you will continue to scratch through dirt like a chicken, without much progress or result. However, get an eagle’s eye view of your life (that’s the map you put onto your A3) and you will notice that you understand the sequence of what needs to be done first, second, and third… why it needs to be done that way and what you are planning to achieve as a result.

Here is an example of the mind map.

         6.   Don’t try to hurt your enemies

When you feel that you are absolutely in the right, and that other person just absolutely unjustifiably acts against you, there can be a civil way out. Wise and proven to work every time.

Problem: You are hurt, you feel pure injustice towards you, be that in business or in private life. It is all caused by your enemy, or somebody who has happened to play a role of an enemy at this part in your life. So you splash into lengthy emails justifying your positions and how silly and incompetent your enemy is acting as they do… It takes lots of thinking, emotion, and time. What do you get in return? An email or a phone call which states that you are even worse than you thought! Now your thoughts are streaming towards: ‘Am I really that bad?’, and ‘I’ve never noticed that about me’. Next thing you do, you lose your time and temper in getting out yet another hurtful message/email/phone call. The snow ball of bitterness and argument just keeps getting bigger, depriving you of sleep, quality of life and inevitably diminishing your productivity.

Diagnosis: Inability to stop the deadly cycle of bitterness or argument can cost you a lot. Reputation, emotional imbalance, time.. When you concentrate on something (whether good or bad), others areas of your life get overlooked. It is just a natural balance of life. So spending too much time and effort of trying to prove yourself right to your enemy and (hopefully) hurt them or bring them down, first of all brings yourself down. So what do you do?

Cure: There are two powerful things that are bound to get your enemy down. First, quit conversing. What is a conversation? It’s like in tennis: you hit the ball, your opponent hits that ball back to you, again you hit, he hits and so on. Stop the game, don’t hit the ball back. Treat your opponent to some torturous feeling of being ‘not in the know’: “What’s going to happen next? Why silence? What do I do?” And while your opponent is guessing at what’s really going on, start working on enforcing the positive and successful image of yours.

Keep smiling, it makes other people wonder what you’ve been up to! And while you are re-enforcing that happy image, you will suddenly notice that centre of your attention has naturally shifted: from conflict to creativeness.

         7.   Exaggerate to get the spice of life!

As you are concentrating on your happy and successful image, exaggerate: to yourself, to your partner, to your friends, and to your opponents.

Problem: Modesty could often be a problem. ‘Have you done this presentation? Looks amazing!’ – ‘Yes, well, I did. But it’s nothing special, really….’ ‘Thank you for dinner, that was beautiful!’ – ‘Ah, no worries, it’s just dinner, nothing special’. Does this sound to you that this person could be a successful entrepreneur or an amazing host? No, the spice of life is taken out.

Diagnosis: Inability to accept praise, lack of your own scrumptious descriptions for your projects and unnecessary modesty stops you from enjoying life, from maximising the enjoyment from the things you do. Other people eventually start to see you in the same light you positioned yourself first: there is nothing special in her/his life. Before you know it, you become kind of a grey mouse.

Cure: Exaggerate! Cooking? Creating a project? Spending time with your friends and family?  Talk about it as something special, elaborate, and add some delectable descriptions and details. It will help you to feel your life deeper, discover that you are already living an amazing life. It will put you into a certain habit of thinking great about your own actions and achievements, which is vital for living a happy life. It will give others a possibility to see you as an interesting, worthy of praise and attention person, living a very exciting life to its fullest.

Yours,

Katya French

Panama Papers - Good advertising for us!

The so called ‘Panama papers scandal’ has made a lot of heads turn to the asset protection industry. Our Principal at IN Fiduciary Services, Nico Francken says: “It’s good advertising for us!”

Offshore, or now increasingly popular mid-shore business, has been huge for decades. Today, the news media is having a heyday with one of the biggest data leaks in history. Unfortunately, certain politicians and, as an inevitable effect, general public, show an amazing level of ignorance on the subject of foreign trusts, foundations and other vehicles for privacy and wealth preservation.

We see it as our opportunity to step up and inform our current and potential clients of what the offshore industry really is. Where do we come in, as fiduciary services provider, what are our tactics and approaches?

One of the statements from Mossack Fonseca actually made an important point, and that is that the offshore industry is “not particularly well understood by the public.”

In this whirlpool of media materials on ‘secret tax heavens’ and ‘money laundering’, the journalists are forgetting to mention a simple fact that offshore business is, actually, used by the majority of entrepreneurs for completely legitimate purposes: 

•         Asset protection
•          Stream lining of international business and investment and
•           Management and maintenance of family wealth

IN Fiduciary Services generally do not use ‘tax heavens’ for these purposes. We use sophisticated and progressive financial and business centers that have been known for decades by their stable legal and political systems.

To stay on top, it is important to observe strict KYC (Know Your Client) rules and to perform excellent Due Diligence on the client. Today, our general client is becoming more educated and understanding of this matter. The words “I don’t want to” are no longer an option.  If a client to preserve his hard earned wealth or optimise their business structure, we will ask to provide evidence of their source of funds and to disclose their persona and intentions.

There is a brilliant saying: “Today’s newspaper is tomorrow’s Fish ‘n’ Chip paper”. This is so true, so we let the wind of the Panama scandal blow while it is blowing, while we carry on business as usual, offering you and your clients effective tools for optimising their business and private real needs.That is asset protection in 4 of the world’s prestigious jurisdictions, which have sophisticated legal and tax systems, brilliantly designed over many years:

Singapore                            New Zealand                      The Netherlands              Labuan (Malaysia)

Saving your Love

Ah the beauty of the married life! “Over the past year or two, we have been going through a rough patch. I love him very much but all these routine problems of life started to get on top of us. Arguments blowing out of nothing, word after word, and before you know it, we are two opposing parties rather than a unit.” Sounds familiar?

In the beginning

When people are dating all their energy goes towards finding things in common, the things you like or finding cute. You concentrate on his handsome smile, his sense of humor. He cooks for you for the first time and gets the kitchen in the state of a war zone: grease, spills, and dirty dishes everywhere. You look at these all and you think: “Ah, isn’t he adorable! He even knows how to cook!”

So what becomes different in 7-10 years’ time?

The first crisis comes when you start living together. This is when you notice your energy starting to deviate towards finding differences and dislikes rather than things in common. That could be lifestyle, upbringing, life perspective and – most importantly – habits.

Years go by, and both of you keep “practising” to notice what you don’t like about each other, what annoys you. It becomes the main focus of attention. You have now programmed yourself to respond with frustration, anger and resentment to the majority of everyday situations. Other areas of your life together (affection, sweet talks about nothing, sex) start to fall out of the picture.

Your thoughts and feelings now sound like:

-          I can’t stand this any more!

-          I’m better off to be by myself!

-          Life is completely out of order!

-         Where to next?

The reality of life is like a snowball, rolling… and all the stress, money problems, ethical disagreements are growing fast around the heart of our love and affection.

And so hence is the question: where to next?

The rest of this article is written for those who still love their partner and who wants to save the relationship.

I would like to introduce you to the term ‘logotherapy’. It is a psychiatric theory which was founded by Viktor Frankl, a Jewish psychiatrist who was imprisoned by Nazis during the WWII. When he had nothing left, all his family being destroyed in concentration camps, alone and severely beaten, he started to become aware of one thing: no one can rob him of the right to decide within himself how it would all affect him. He had the power to choose his own responses.

Logotherapy is a term derived from “logos,” a Greek word that translates as “meaning”, “knowledge” and therapy. Logotherapy is prompting you to stop thinking ‘Everything is sh…!’ ‘There’s no way out!’ It’s helping you to save what good you still have left, through choosing your attitudes and responses. Through the awareness of what ‘bad’ or ‘unwanted’ is developing and is about to blow out of control (another argument..), and through realising it and pretty much ‘calculating’ your approach to it.

It is not easy, I can tell you. Years of resentment and frustration towards your partner is a habit that had developed over time. Like any bad habit, it will take time to overcome it.

So here is a challenge. Over the next month try to pre-analyse your responses when going through difficult and unpleasant situations and talks. My own experience tells me it is much easier and natural to react rather than respond thoughtfully.

This simple chart will help you understand the cycle and how to break it.

Here is to keeping peace with your loved ones! Go, get back to that person you once started dating and found so amazing! And by all means, do use the same approach with your parents and kids.

Book your 1 week coaching and get the answers to your problems here

9 thoughts that will change your life perspective

Sometimes it feels like there is no tomorrow. You are in the darkness of today and nothing is going to change… not tomorrow, not in a month’s time, not in a life-time. Do you know that feeling?

What can make you smile, take it easier? Only your own thoughts. Especially for you, I have written this article which is called ‘9 thoughts that will change your life perspective’.

Even if everything is absolutely perfect in your life at present, it is not a bad idea to be prepared and know exactly what to think and do when your mood will plummet down against your expectations..  So don’t just read but try to implement it into your life. Remember that 'knowledge' is not you have heard somewhere, at some stage, but rather what you have experienced when you applied it into your real life.

1. Everything that happens to you is helping you to grow and become better and wiser. Even if it is not really noticeable.

Life and circumstances will always be changing you. Sometimes it happens abruptly and just swamps you off your feet. You might wonder: what else on earth can happen? You might feel that all your dreams and achievements have been crushed, and now you are like in a black hole. You want to run away from it all, but you can’t. It is hard to imagine that these problems are changing you for the better. The truth is: often, in order to achieve something better you will need to go through the worse. To start a better, new life you would need to get over your old one, completely and utterly. And then leave it behind. When you face difficulties you open up to a new potential that WILL help you to sort out things in your life.

2. People and opportunities come and go.

We all change over time. You are not the same as you were a few years ago. As a result of it, your preferences, desires, demands and life perspective change, too. That affects the way you react to certain people and situations. Losing a friend/partner/job can be stressful and painful. You might notice you’re asking yourself one question: WHY??? …..But give yourself the luxury of allowing changes in your life. Nothing is fully stable and permanent. Whatever happens to you, happens for a reason. There is probably something better waiting around the corner!

3. Changes are unavoidable.

Change is good. Growth is good. Even though it can be quite painful. Believe me, the biggest pain in your life is only when it all stalls, and nothing else happens. And nothing else matters, everything is exactly as it was a few years ago. Those are the warning bells. We, as human beings, are rather unique: our development comes with change. So start taking these changes as your progress, rather than your pain.

4. Bitching about…

Excuse my French… but this is exactly what it is. Things are not the way you want them to be, and what do you do? You bitch about it, you moan, you complain. Discussions with your friends/colleagues/family members are regular and never ending. But do they get you anywhere? Only actions will get you where you want to be or at least will put you on the right path towards fixing things. So instead of putting yourself in the position of a constant moaner, perhaps it’s time to take the first actual step towards resolving the situation?

5. Your piece of mind depends on your way of thinking.

When you fail to have a flexible life perspective, possibly a more positive one, you put yourself into a continuous cycle of doubt, anxiety, fear and disappointment. Your thinking is a battlefield between your good and bad thoughts, ideas and beliefs. Take a bit of extra effort and allow clean and happy thoughts into your heart and you will feel fresh and more motivation within.

6. You have a natural talent to change someone else’s life.

You were blessed with an ability to feel kindness, compassion and forgiveness. These qualities were given to you so you can live a bigger and broader life, not just so you can live in your own little bubble. There is no need to try and change the world. Just bring some happiness into someone else’s life, and you will feel a great relief and an amazing feeling of accomplishment.

7. A bit of ‘me’ time.

I was told once that being a mother of three, a wife, and a business woman I tend to forget about myself, that I don’t give myself enough of ‘me’ time. I disagreed: I have duties, responsibilities. Now I understand: more time for beloved me = happier family and a more productive business. Sounds too simple? Well, yes, life is actually pretty simple. There is no need to over-complicate it.

8. Every person you meet along the way is for a reason.

We meet different people along the way. Each one of them teaches us something. It might not be always obvious and immediately apparent what you gather from that person. It is something that you process over time. Maybe you were lucky to meet someone with amazing time management skills and everyday planning. Maybe you came across the kindest and sweetest person you’ve ever seen. Or perhaps your career path crossed with a selfish and arrogant person who was all wrapped up in KPIs (Key Performance Indicators) and who didn’t care about real people. In the end, you learn a lesson from each of these people and situations: you learn what to do – what not to do, and what kind of person you want to be.

9. You are not the only one who feels lonely and insecure.

The world is full of lonely and insecure people. Even those who are seemingly surrounded by a crowd of fans and friends could feel very lonely inside. Before any social scenarios and settings, we are first of all individuals (note: ‘individual’ – adjective which means ‘single’, ‘separate’). Everyone wants to be understood and accepted: those who play the role of a peacock and those who appear as a grey little mouse. Everyone has insecurities and dreams. Somewhere out there, there is a person who totally understands you and accepts you. This definitely makes you less lonely.

So go on, use these thoughts to find your perfect balance and change your way of thinking to make it better for yourself!

Yours,

Katya French  - Professional certified coach, choose your programme here: www.cherryblossomcoach.com

Life is about to begin...

New Zealand KORU, symbol of new beginnings

What an amazing phrase I've just read, it is a pure reflection of what I personally am going through and I bet a lot of you do as well.

For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to get through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. The life would begin. At last it dawned on me that those obstacles were my life. - Alfred D'Souza

You can train yourself to do anything, you can nurture any skill, and the skill I choose to nurture is the ability to enjoy life, every day, now and not in some distant future.

Stop delaying life

We are all extremely good at delaying life enjoyment for later. But the truth is 'when the house is built', 'when the debts are all paid off' and 'when I get a better job' might not happen at all. It is not the constant obstacles on the way to the brighter future that we are going through, it is real life. And time to enjoy it is NOW.

In my online course called 'Turning Point - Reactivate Your Life' I talk about this in detail as well as draw a wholesome picture of other areas of everyday life that are vital to address if you want to be happier and satisfied.

Get your balance and happiness now

Part of the nature of humans is to be constantly developing, growing and moving towards a balanced and mature way of being. Our present personality is determined by both who and what we have been and by the person we strive to become.

The goal of this online training is to learn and apply special principles which enable us to attain emotional wellbeing, understanding and effectiveness in everyday life.

P.S. I currently have a special deal running: it gives you 33% discount off the normal price. This offer is limited to the first 50 students to sign up.

STEP 1: Click the course link Turning Point - Reactivate Your Life
STEP 2: On your right, click Redeem a Coupon
STEP 3: Enter code   FB33
STEP 4: Get your lifetime access to this online course and start your Change!

Ready for change - Reactivate your life!

Exciting news! 

Hey, after 4 years of research and nearly 1 year in the making, I am almost ready to release a special online course that teaches my 'secret' method in achieving goals and getting what you want!

Actually, I don't know if it's a secret, but I've never seen anyone else building the sequence of mental approaches the way I did.

SAD PRE-HISTORY

Since I've accepted a full time employment for a government organisation in September last year, I had to give up my passion - training in Personal Development. No words to describe how lonely and unsatisfied I started to feel, not being able to have my usual wonderful audience. My audience of people who are not ready to give up on themselves, people who don't want to stop on what's already achieved...

To be honest, eventually I got to the point where I've lost any interest for life or any further development. The alarm bells were ringing: "Time to get back into what you love, you Passion!"

HAPPY LAUNCH

And so here we are today: after about a month of sleepless nights, my husband and I have finalised our course of 22 lectures, which you would be able to get in a couple of days!

This course is a treasure chest of the most powerful, specially selected knowledge that helps people to go on, to live, to be happy and to achieve amazing results. The way how it is structured changes mindsets and reactivates even the most boring lives.

After the course you would be able to:

• Be able to understand how to go around everyday obstacles and to achieve what you want
• Learn how to deal with pessimism and insecurities (we all hit the wall sometimes)
• Learn a powerful new approach to re-activating your life and achieving actual results smoothly and with confidence

I am very excited and we'll keep you posted on the launch. Keep you eyes open for Launching specials and our special BONUS that will only go to the first 20 students!

5 Reasons to Travel

Ha Giang Province, Northern Vietnam

“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness.” – Mark Twain

“One’s destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things.” – Henry Miller

“He who does not travel does not know the value of men.” –Moorish proverb

What does travel mean from a psychological point of view? What is it capable of giving you? What can you achieve or change in your life, if you were to “dive” skilfully into new cultures and countries?
My short answer to you: Everything! Everything good and positive, just as you desire. I invite you to take a closer look.

We usually tremble with hopes and wishes as we pack our luggage, about to go on a journey. Looking forward to new and amazing experiences, something that we don’t know yet.
The fact is: if you do it right, your journeys can solve lots of your existing problems and help you find the answers to the long standing questions. Here is Katya’s 5 reasons for travel:

Reason #1 – Get away from the everyday routine and problems 

When you change your environment and go on a journey, you feel like a free and alive person again, ready to intake and digest. Even the simplest of travels – sunbathing under the palm trees or trekking along the river is capable of bringing you peace and quiet. Capable of recharging you, as you forget about your everyday worries.

Reason #2 – Become more knowledgeable

It may sound a bit trivial. Nevertheless, this is so important: to keep growing and not to stop on what is already achieved. When you learn about new amazing cultures and traditions, when you see places, you become wiser and people just draw to you and your knowledge.

Reason #3 – Solving your problems

Does it sound familiar to you when you just lay there, unable to sleep, trying to fund solutions for your everlasting problems? No decisions come to mind. You wake up (or get up) exhausted. It feels as though life has just stalled.
By changing your scenery, you inevitably become re-charged and transformed. The trick is to take it seriously, and not to get into the usual habits of grabbing onto your cell-phone or laptop.

Reason #4 – When in Crisis - Reload

Here is a story of one of our clients.

“That’s it, it’s a total crisis. I am constantly angry with everything and everyone around me. But I think I am just angry and unsatisfied with myself and my goals, most of all. Business is not going anywhere. No, not the money flow. It’s all fine there. But where am I going with my strategy, my plans? My constant dissatisfaction with my life and with myself just doesn’t let me go forward, overcome my competition. What’s next? What if you don’t have a Dream anymore?”

What to do? Sometimes the solution can be simpler than you think. Get out of your comfort zone, get a shock. Forget about the ‘poor me’ and ‘no one understands me’ see the people around you. Does someone need more help and attention than you?

This particular client has departed on the travel training called “The Point of No Return”, which consists of such stages as: Formation – Obstacles to Change – Making Choices – and Positive Change. (Why this name? “The point of no return is the point beyond which one must continue on his or her current course of action because turning back is physically impossible, prohibitively expensive or dangerous” source Wikipedia), along with a group of like-minded people who were guided by one famous psychologist with 20 years of experience, Viktoriya Varlamova.

The journey took its place around the Northern part of Vietnam: rich traditions, pristine ethnic minority communes and the most amazing scenery.

The plan was as follows:
2 days for the arrival and look around, combined with the pre-training programme.

4 days in the Province of Ha Giang, in the house of a local farmer (house on stilts, surrounded rice fields and orchards). This is not a touristy place, hence still very authentic, clean and untouched. During the day, our client was helping the underprivileged children, planting trees and helping the local community, as he could. At nights, powerful sessions with the psychologist-trainer, as part of a group. Working on the Point of No Return.

3 days on a beach upon return back to civilization – Reflection. Culmination and the conclusion of the powerful experience and training. Looking back at what sort of person you used to be, habits and tendencies, as well as combining it with the newly acquired knowledge. Building the strategy for the Future.

Want to know the result for that businessman?
He spent 4 days in far away places where tourists don’t go and where he was REAL and where his emotions were RAW. Where he had time to re-think his everyday actions and behaviours. Where he cleansed his mind and soul. He came back re-freshed and re-charged, ready to jump into new adventures, bubbling with a positive drive!

Reason #5 – Re-instating positivity and progress

Travel is the time where you plan your own time and affairs. As it suits you.
It is an emotional re-charge which reactivates the thinking processes in your mind and stimulates your nervous system. The positive emotions find new life whilst the negative ones die off, gradually. No doubt, that after an amazing travel, when you come back home, you will feel that you can react to various situations in life more adequately and make decisions in a wiser and more mature way.

Time to plan your new adventures and travels. Time to pack your luggage and to hunt out new ideas and trends, which will, without a doubt, widen your horizons and give you an amazing new drive in life.
Time to open yourself up to new perspectives and possibilities, to become more skilful at decision-making and grow stronger and wiser.

Our next 2 groups depart on the life-changing training tours:

15 December 2014 - 10 days New Zealand, South Island Adventure - Reloading Happiness and Motivation
4 February 2015 - 8 days Singapore and Pulau Ubin - Reloading Happiness and Motivation

To enquire and book your space now contact Katya on skype: Kalexeichik or email: bookings@nonpareiltravel.com

Why do you need to get away?

Ha Giang Province, Northern Vietnam

“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness.” – Mark Twain

“One’s destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things.” – Henry Miller

“He who does not travel does not know the value of men.” –Moorish proverb

What does travel mean from a psychological point of view? What is it capable of giving you? What can you achieve or change in your life, if you were to “dive” skilfully into new cultures and countries?
My short answer to you: Everything! Everything good and positive, just as you desire. I invite you to take a closer look.

We usually tremble with hopes and wishes as we pack our luggage, about to go on a journey. Looking forward to new and amazing experiences, something that we don’t know yet.
The fact is: if you do it right, your journeys can solve lots of your existing problems and help you find the answers to the long standing questions. Here is Katya’s 5 reasons for travel:

Reason #1 – Get away from the everyday routine and problems 

When you change your environment and go on a journey, you feel like a free and alive person again, ready to intake and digest. Even the simplest of travels – sunbathing under the palm trees or trekking along the river is capable of bringing you peace and quiet. Capable of recharging you, as you forget about your everyday worries.

Reason #2 – Become more knowledgeable

It may sound a bit trivial. Nevertheless, this is so important: to keep growing and not to stop on what is already achieved. When you learn about new amazing cultures and traditions, when you see places, you become wiser and people just draw to you and your knowledge.

Reason #3 – Solving your problems

Does it sound familiar to you when you just lay there, unable to sleep, trying to fund solutions for your everlasting problems? No decisions come to mind. You wake up (or get up) exhausted. It feels as though life has just stalled.
By changing your scenery, you inevitably become re-charged and transformed. The trick is to take it seriously, and not to get into the usual habits of grabbing onto your cell-phone or laptop.

Reason #4 – When in Crisis - Reload

Here is a story of one of our clients.

“That’s it, it’s a total crisis. I am constantly angry with everything and everyone around me. But I think I am just angry and unsatisfied with myself and my goals, most of all. Business is not going anywhere. No, not the money flow. It’s all fine there. But where am I going with my strategy, my plans? My constant dissatisfaction with my life and with myself just doesn’t let me go forward, overcome my competition. What’s next? What if you don’t have a Dream anymore?”

What to do? Sometimes the solution can be simpler than you think. Get out of your comfort zone, get a shock. Forget about the ‘poor me’ and ‘no one understands me’ see the people around you. Does someone need more help and attention than you?

This particular client has departed on the travel training called “The Point of No Return”, which consists of such stages as: Formation – Obstacles to Change – Making Choices – and Positive Change. (Why this name? “The point of no return is the point beyond which one must continue on his or her current course of action because turning back is physically impossible, prohibitively expensive or dangerous” source Wikipedia), along with a group of like-minded people who were guided by one famous psychologist with 20 years of experience, Viktoriya Varlamova.

The journey took its place around the Northern part of Vietnam: rich traditions, pristine ethnic minority communes and the most amazing scenery.

The plan was as follows:
2 days for the arrival and look around, combined with the pre-training programme.

4 days in the Province of Ha Giang, in the house of a local farmer (house on stilts, surrounded rice fields and orchards). This is not a touristy place, hence still very authentic, clean and untouched. During the day, our client was helping the underprivileged children, planting trees and helping the local community, as he could. At nights, powerful sessions with the psychologist-trainer, as part of a group. Working on the Point of No Return.

3 days on a beach upon return back to civilization – Reflection. Culmination and the conclusion of the powerful experience and training. Looking back at what sort of person you used to be, habits and tendencies, as well as combining it with the newly acquired knowledge. Building the strategy for the Future.

Want to know the result for that businessman?
He spent 4 days in far away places where tourists don’t go and where he was REAL and where his emotions were RAW. Where he had time to re-think his everyday actions and behaviours. Where he cleansed his mind and soul. He came back re-freshed and re-charged, ready to jump into new adventures, bubbling with a positive drive!

Reason #5 – Re-instating positivity and progress

Travel is the time where you plan your own time and affairs. As it suits you.
It is an emotional re-charge which reactivates the thinking processes in your mind and stimulates your nervous system. The positive emotions find new life whilst the negative ones die off, gradually. No doubt, that after an amazing travel, when you come back home, you will feel that you can react to various situations in life more adequately and make decisions in a wiser and more mature way.

Time to plan your new adventures and travels. Time to pack your luggage and to hunt out new ideas and trends, which will, without a doubt, widen your horizons and give you an amazing new drive in life.
Time to open yourself up to new perspectives and possibilities, to become more skilful at decision-making and grow stronger and wiser.

Our next 2 groups depart on the life-changing training tours:

15 December 2014 - 10 days New Zealand, South Island Adventure - Reloading Happiness and Motivation
4 February 2015 - 8 days Singapore and Pulau Ubin - Reloading Happiness and Motivation

To enquire and book your space now contact Katya on skype: Kalexeichik or email: bookings@nonpareiltravel.com

Couple of shots from The Fullerton Suite, 5 years ago

You would love these shots because it is so different now! The whole landscape of Singapore has changed in the last 5 years. See the cranes on the right? That's the beginning of the Marina Bay Sands. Taken from the Fullerton Suite balcony.

And this is our Champagne breakfast (or the part thereof)

Unique tour of Singapore

I have been in Travel industry for over 13 years before I changed my profession. Travel is my passion and so I am happy to share my knowledge with you.

Singapore is a thriving cosmopolitan city that is brimming with diversity, as well as an array of culture, language, arts and architecture.

Singapore is romantic, elegant and breathing with high spirit. This city can show you its modern glass and steel, and then it will capture your heart forever with its old bumboats and the last of the Kampungs (Malay style old settlements).

What Singapore is really about – warmth, enriching and unforgettable experience.

Let me take you on a very rare, uncommon adventure around one of my favourite cities in the world.
The program that I prepared for you makes Singapore experience wholesome and personal, drawing the allure from the breadth and richness of attractions many have grown to love here in Singapore.

8 days, 7 nights in Singapore

Plan: Arrival - Singapore city, past and present - Modern Gardens, Cloud Forest - East Coast Park, bicycles, walks and food  - Kampung villages - Backyard of Singapore, Ubin island by bumboats

What can be in the tour:

-         7 nights accommodation at The Fullerton Hotel, room of your choice

-         Transfers from and to the Airport

-         Breakfasts on the mornings of the Tour

-         Tours as described below, with all ticketing, guiding and transportation
-     Singapore Sling at Long Bar, Chilli Crab dinner, and late lunch after Ubin island

-         Your personal host for the group, all through the ‘on-the-ground’ journey

Not included in the tour:

-         International air fares

-         Any other meal expenses associated with the tour that are not listed above
-     Entries to Viewing Platforms at Marina Bay Sands or any other entry tickets not prescribed in the program

Day 1 Arrival.

Transfer to the Fullerton Hotel. Built in 1928, it used to be the General Post Office, Chamber of Commerce and the Singapore Club.  Once upon a time, the Fullerton Hotel protected the harbour.  On its rooftop stood the lighthouse, whose beacon safely guided ships into the harbour.  The restoration and conversion of this beautiful old building into a 400 room luxury hotel cost over $300 million.

Relax at the pool and enjoy the views of the river, the old Esplanade bridge, and the Old Government quarters.

Day 2 Modern Singapore

Wake up to the view of the Singapore Flyer and just in time for a scrumptious buffet breakfast with brilliant selection of hot food, fruit and baking.

We start our journey around Singapore from dazzling Marina Bay Waterfront. You will visit the amazing complex of Marina Bay Sands. People say that the boat on the top symbolises Singapore’s fishing village past. Others say, it’s a Dragon, sitting at the mouth of the sea, protecting the wealth of Singapore.

In the evening, before you retire to have a wonder of the city by yourself, we invite you to the city’s old bar, Raffles bar. You will be pleased with the relaxed atmosphere here: get a bowl of peanuts, sprinkle shells as you’re pleased, on the floor. Noone will even tell you off. Ah, and of course, this is the place to try the one and famous Singapore Sling cocktail, right where the recipe was born!

Day 3  The Gardens and the Local Spirit

The Gardens captures the essence of Singapore as the premier tropical Garden City with the perfect environment to live and work. It is just 5 minutes from your hotel.

Monet once referred to his garden as his most beautiful masterpiece. Singapore’s new icon, a 101-hectare horticultural attraction, certainly seems to be the nation’s most beautiful with more than 250 thousand rare plants in huge domed conservatories.

Enter the Cloud Forest, a mysterious world veiled in mist. A 35-metre tall mountain covered in lush vegetation shrouding the world’s tallest indoor waterfall showcases plant life from tropical highlands up to 2,000-metres above sea level.
You will have a few hours free time in between the activities of the day.

Later on, we will spend the afternoon at the East Coast Park, doing what the locals do: rent a bicycle, or just enjoy the stroll along the waterfront park. We will finish the day with a delicious Chilli Crab meal and a refreshing local beer or sugar-cane juice at a very special foodcourt, right on the beach.

Day 4 Kampong and Kampong Glam

We are now getting closer to the real old Singapore culture. In Malay, the word "Kampung" means "village or settlement". It’s one of the two last surviving kampongs in the modern mainland of Singapore, Kampong Lorong Buangkok.  The kampong was built in 1956 and is still a privately owned piece of land.   This is one of not so many places in Singapore where you will see REAL life and see REAL smiles.

We then visit the Kampong Glam. The name originates from the Gelam Tree, which once grew abundantly in the area. In 1822, the land in Kampong Glam was officially allocated to the Malays and others in the Muslim community, including a small but successful community of Arab traders.

Day 5 Pulau Ubin – Away from the Big World

Pulau Ubin is in essence, the last of the 2 'kampong' (villages) in Singapore. A stroll through Ubin takes you back to Singapore in the 1960's with the simpler pleasures of life. The slow lane starts as soon as you join the queue for the bumboat at Changi. As you arrive, all cares are left behind.

Ubin is a great day trip spent walking or pedalling through rustic roads under swaying coconut palms, exploring shady trails in overgrown rubber plantations, checking out secluded beaches and flourishing mangroves. On Ubin, the air is fresher and sights and sounds so soothing to the soul.

Day 6 Wetlands and Kranji Farms

We relocate to the real wild world of this region.

The beautiful 130ha Reserve includes mangroves and freshwater wetlands.

The Reserve is a home to an amazing diversity of all sort of interesting plants and animals. Among the stars of the Reserve are a family of wild otters! The resident crocodile also results in some excitement. Lively monitor lizards abound, as do all manner of other wild creatures, like large lizards, herons and even some resident snakes. Don’t be afraid though: it is totally monitored and safe in the Park.

We then relocate to Kranji Countryside. You’ll see the lesser known side of Singapore, with a variety of different farms available for exploration. Learn about their farming practices, with farms for eggs, milk and fruits, and others that breed fish, dogs, goats and other animals.

Day 7 Free time

We’ve had a busy few days. Singapore is a large little city. You might have had a few more dream visit points in mind… Digest the information received over the last week, and visit the city – your way.

Day 8 Departure

We transfer you to the airport, saying “We will see you again” and knowing that a part of your heart will love Singapore, forever.

If you like my itineraries, please share - I would be so happy if I could help!